Week 1, run 5

One of the reasons I started this blog was when i first thought about doing this I went online to find out if it was doable or had be achieved by someone with fibro. And, try as I might, i couldn't really find an answer to that question. OK, i knew whatever I found online wasnt going to be my final answer, only I could know if it was doable for me personally but I still wanted the insight that i might get from someone elses experiences. But other than questions, I couldn't find any tales of people learning to run with this disease.

So often, we are told things we can't do. Or questioned why we cant do x because "you dont look sick". I have heard both and neither makes sense to me. Lately, what i have been hearing about though is negative things about me attempting this. Reasons why I can't or shouldnt do it or just general put downs about making this attempt, thinly disguised as jokes. Some people dont even bother to disguise it at all. Is it envy because I am trying something another wouldnt think of? Maybe. Is it that others can't understand why I would even bother? I think there is some of that but honestly, I dont fully understand the problem.

First of all, to get to this point, I spent almost 6 months working up to this first run - to being able to walk/jog for half an hour and for most of that to be walking, only a cumulative total of 8 minutes jogging each time i go out. I went to bootcamp and to various exercise classes to get to this strong. I went on walks outside to get myself used to it. I didnt know when I started that I wanted to do a couch to 5k. I just knew i wanted to increase my fitness and work on managing this disease.

I have looked into the face of my future. I have seen people with my condition unable to function without assistance, unable to walk, cook or preform daily activities. And that future both terrified me and was something i wasnt willing to accept. I looked into the research of the best ways to treat and slow down the progession of this and study after study, paper after paper, everything came down to exercise. It isnt a cure, by any means, and medication is needed to support but the real differences in quality of life, in abilities, came down to exercise. So...Exercise I will, until i physically can't move anymore. Im running so hard from my future, literally.

I finished another run today, in the cold. I dont love the cold although you do sweat less. I am even getting to the point that by the time i think "please, dear god, let this interval be over" the magic little voice comes on at tells me to slow down to a brisk walk. So next week, I will move on to stage two and push myself harder. My pace might slow again, but at least i will be running longer. I can even actually sort of listen and pay a small amount of attention to my music now, not just have my huffing and puffing drown it out. And that, my friends, is progress.